Ringtone roulette

Discover The Sound Of Public Embarrassment

Rajbir Singh & Chhavi Gupta, AIS Gurugram 43, Alumni

Imagine this: You are taking that one nap that you waited for all week. And then… your phone explodes. Because your device believes quiet moments are illegal. And personalised ringtones? Even better. Nothing screams maturity like ‘Baby Shark’ echoing across a conference room. Yes, my ringtone goes doo doo doo doo doo doo. Welcome to ringtone roulette – where every call is a gamble.

The rock anthem disaster
It’s 2 AM. The world rests, but your dad’s on a call with important US clients next door. Suddenly, a guitar solo rips through the night like it’s auditioning for a tour. You panic. And across the room, Bon Jovi roars at maximum volume: “Woaah, we’re half way there!” Your ringtone doesn’t just ring; it performs.

The classical overcorrection
Embarrassed by your rock concert phase, you switch to something elegant. A soft and peaceful melody. Now your phone rings with the enthusiasm of a polite whisper. So polite, in fact, that you never hear it. It rings. It stops. Life goes on. You discover three missed calls and a disappointed mother. If it slips under a pillow? Gone. You could exhaust unlimited calling and still not locate it. It’s less a ringtone and more a background suggestion. Very useless.
The ‘normal’ ringtone crisis
After enough humiliation, you retreat to the default tone. But now comes a new fear… the fear of being boring. Your phone rings among friends. Heads turn. Someone whispers, “You never changed it?” There is no winning from this judgement.

The infamous iPhone tone
Every iPhone user knows it. That cheerful, unstoppable jingle. The one that cuts through walls, dignity, and inner peace. It doesn’t ring; it announces. If ancient wars had this ringtone, history would appear very different. Forget swords and strategy, just press play and watch your enemies surrender within seconds.

The Android lullaby
And then comes the legend of the Android ringtones - ‘Flowers’ tone. Set it as an alarm and congratulations, you have invented a musical sleeping pill. Suddenly, you are in a meadow, chasing butterflies, ignoring calls from your boss. Productivity? Questionable. Peaceful? Absolutely.

In the end, ringtones are tiny chaos machines we willingly carry in our pockets. Too loud, and you terrify wildlife. Too soft, and you miss life entirely. Too normal, and society questions your personality. So, the next time your phone erupts at the worst possible moment, take a deep breath. After all, it’s not just a ringtone; it is character development.

(Rajbir is pursuing Bachelor of Engineering (Chemical) from Panjab University and Chhavi is pursuing B Com (Hons) from Hansraj College, DU.)

Still human? Not so sure!

Name of the album: OK Computer | Artist: Radiohead Released on: May 21, 1997 | Genre: Electronic & Alternative rock, Art pop

Synopsis: This album is a trailblazing musical achievement by the English rock band Radiohead, which is widely hailed for its atmospheric soundscapes and deep exploration of humanity. Nearly three decades after its release, OK Computer remains one of the most celebrated albums in the music history. It is a reflection of modern humanity’s rapidly growing dependence on technology in the pursuit of progress. But do not mistake it for following a singular storyline, the album presents a diverse collection of interconnected tracks, capturing the complexity of chaos that is real life. Each song combines poetic lyricism, symbolism, and unconventional structures with haunting melodies, giving the album unique perspectives and making it both powerful and thought-provoking.

Why is it worth listening: OK Computer is a rare blend of musical innovation and sincere storytelling. While this piece of artistic brilliance has earned a Grammy and a Brit Award, it needs no trophy to prove its influence and rarity. Radiohead’s experimental production resonates with the listeners’ souls by exploring themes of isolation and human connection through clever symbolism, forcing the audience to introspect and reflect on life. The album is an immersive experience that will be relatable for generations to come.

My favourite song: ‘Karma Police’ has to be my absolute favourite. It not only evokes timeless emotions like guilt and pressure, but it also makes one want to perhaps be a better human being. However, it is the unusual chord progression and beautiful bridge that truly make this track stand out from the rest of the album.

Rating:

Review by: Jyena Gupta

AIS Raipur, X A